Garavito Attacks Again [Amputated Genitals]

I listen to Amputated Genitals when I’m bored….

I’m in a rather ireful mood today, so I went to go find an Amputated Genitals song to review trash. Seriously, if you follow my blog at ALL you’ll know I despise this band for their lack of any sort of musical direction. So I browse the Tube and come across this song. Garavito Attacks Again….sounds like the title of an axed Star Trek episode.

For some reason that I no longer remember, I thought that this song would be a lot different than the two that I reviewed earlier. I would now like you to know that I’m clean and I’ve been dry for four months, so go me! I think….listening to this song killed my brain cells.

So now in true Seshuuka fashion, let’s grab the lyrics (read: disgusting) and with a new twist!: I’m going to bash these lyrics line by line!

192 juicy bodies of children.

The vocalist of this band has officially lost any shred of respect that I may have held for his death metal yodels. And that’s not even on an ireful note. I am completely serious when I’m telling you that you don’t need to bring children into death metal. Leave them in the realm of Demi Lovato or the Jonas Brothers. Store your seven year old porn under your dirty mattress or in your box called “camping equipment”. That alone makes me think you’re a pedophile, and if that’s what you’re aiming for in this song than your writing skills need some, or a lot of improvement. Shit, reading that makes me think that you’re talking about Gummy Bears or something. And the fact that you say juicy bothers me more. Curse you and your use of adjectives.

I’m a sadist. I’m looking for a child. I feel guilt but i feel hate.

Maybe that’s a sign that you need HELP? I feel guilt but I feel hate? Go masturbate. Go home and procreate. Shit out what you ate. Why are you looking for children? And thank you for promoting the Mormon Church. As if I don’t have enough of them knocking on my door.

That extreme force something strange tells me. Go to kill, kill them, that beast was me.

Your grammar fails. Really, that’s indecipherable to me.

HARDKOAR LYRIKEZ

I bought some bottles of liquor and I decide to kill him in a violent manner.

So now you’re an alcoholic too, or are you improvising? And how else are you supposed to kill them?

“Excuse me there. Do you mind taking out your lollipop? Can I kill you peacefully?”

Keep in mind that it’s a him. What happened to the other 191?

Always I have in my bag, rope, razor blades, and a big knife.

I pulled them out of my box called “camping equipment”.

Tie his hands and I caress the body, pull out his clothes and I rape him,naked.

A gay alcoholic sadist…..and wait. Wait just one minute.

and I rape him,naked.

I rape him,naked.

rape him,naked.

I’ve never heard of sex with clothes on….

I, bitting a lot his body, I, burning his skin with a candle, I felt very good doing it.

Sounds like a four year old got high on Crayola…and where the fuck did you get the candle from?

HARDKOAR LYRICS +2

Slashing in 59 times his body, I practiced satanic rites with the children that i murdered.

I thought you only murdered one child. And I’m not sure that you can “slashing in” a body 59 times.

I have a pact with the devil.

The only meaningful, grammatically correct sentence in this song.

I cut his genitals and his anus, and I put his penis in his mouth.

The devil or the child(ren)? And how do you cut an anus off?

This body without testicles or eyes, Abdomen without guts, with only one hack, cut his head

OK I get the testicles. Eye? Where’d the guts go? O wait, probably when you “slashing in”. And cut his head. Off? 3/4? Mild graze?

And that’s just a waste of a penis >:o

“SOMEONE SET US UP THE SONG”

I really looked toward this song for a shred of lyrical ingenuity, even over all the constipated baby shitting but I just can’t find one. When your definition of a sadist is the clearest you get in a song, then you really need some work. I went extreme up there for the lulz. I get that Garavito’s the vocalist and that he’s chronicling Garavito’s thoughts (I DO listen to Kyo) but it’s not clear. What is Garavito doing? He’s killing? How many has he killed? Why does he kill children and not adults? Why can Garavito conjure candles?

Is Garavito real?

Well that’s food for thought (sliced I ate the penis) so let’s get to the music. I can sense some competence in the notes but it’s marred by

- the vocalist choking on his own phlegm and fail

- the drummer who obscures everything on the track

- bad audio and programming

- my mute button

Let’s not even start on the bass. I’m unsure if they have one or not. Drums sound awfully static as well. This will be the last individual song review before I do their album so this song gets a….

.1/5

Yes that’s right. .1. Not ONE. POINT ONE. As in one-tenth.