Kill me now.
Chessman Red Monday is not music. In five and a half minutes of what sounds like the lead singer choking on Listerine, the band sounds like Dir en grey’s THE MARROW OF A BONE shoved into a blender and then excreted through a metal tube. I couldn’t get past two minutes, and I doubt the song changes in the last three. I found myself frantically searching for the STOP THIS SHIT button the minute this thing hit two minutes. This song, in blatant terms, is horrible. Rancid, putrid NOISE shoved onto a piece of plastic and sold to you for your money. People call this “grind metal”. I call this acidifying bullshit. Or, if you wanna be liberal and call this prog rock, I’ll tell you they progressed right back into the Stone Age.
The lead singer sounds like a caveman.
I hope someone amputated YOUR genitals, fuckers.
I mean HONESTLY, what part of the Internet did God excrete this band out of? This is why people look at me weird when I say I listen to rock music. Ugly refuse such as Amputated Genitals automatically springs to mind, instead of the infinitely more popular metal, rock, and pop-rock bands out there. Hell, I could get 5 or 10 American rock bands (AMERICAN) that actually produce music.
Music consists of dynamic range, and since someone AMPUTATED your genitals they must have also extracted your eardrums. Or maybe those exploded when you listened to this fail that you call music. There is no sort of musical expression on this song. The drums are static as fuck and sound like someone recorded them on a machine. Fast drums are cool when there’s a melody behind it, but the guitars sound like machine guns going faulty. There isn’t even a melody there. I didn’t pick one up. Did they just wham on their guitars to hit every string possible? If they were going for a divide by zero error, they just hit zero. Zero skill.
Hell, even Dethklok, with their grind metal, has MELODY and STYLE and SKILL. You, Genitalia, fail it. What is the concept of your music? A man’s life without genitalia is painful, boring, and needs to be ended? Or are these merely the sounds of someone getting their genitals severed? As a matter of fact, was all your talent IN your genitals? That explains this pile of shit that you excreted out your front hole.
And the singer, might I tell you, FUCKING SUCKS. He sounds like he’s saying DRINK DRINK. What the fuck are you trying to say in your angst-ridden drunk stupor? How about you sing your lyrics, or else scratch vocalist from your musical profession and call yourself failure? If anything, you make this song suck. Vocalists are supposed to be the connection to the listener, and instead you deafen anyone even willing to approach your music with this vile, nasty mess. You MAKE people want to amputate their genitals listening to this song. You really do.
God, I think I’m contracting ovarian cancer listening to this mess. So someone tell me, what the hell is up with bands trying to be “HARDKOAR” by putting blood, gore, and skin all over their album covers? It is not HARDKOAR. It makes you look stupid, like seventeen year olds in a garage metal band. What the fuck, you couldn’t be even remotely creative GONADS? At least if you’re going to call yourselves genitalia, draw yourself a picture of a dick and slap it on the album cover. No, instead we get naked, ripped up, destroyed, bloody bodies on an album cover.
Nobody gets sexual stimulation from that you sick perverted freaks.
In short, this song is horrible, and this band needs to NOT get the jump to major. Hell, they shouldn’t be indies. They give rock a bad name and they should disband and cook oatmeal cookies.
Lyrics (these are fucking disgusting):
I see a car
40 year old woman
with a fat and stupid vanity
long brown hair, a lot of grease in her body
her sigth full of fear
I hit the side car window
With my red light lantern
I pull out of the car her yelling boyfriend
And Ipack him in the trunk
She try to scape and I catch her inside the car
Strangling, and put her body in the bath
I rip her clothes,
I strangle her
And I put her humanity in the back seat
Cut her neck and let the blood flow.Her blood exite me
with my fingers
Stain my chest, shulders and arms
I try to open her mouthShe drip a colorless muck
Introduce my dick in her mouth full of blood
A gush of blood mixed with my cum
Untouchable, Im not slowly and progresive like the lepra,
Im quick and mortal like pest,
I drop the body outside
With one hack break her skull
Then with the car, I grind her breast
I kneel, I put my dick in her mouth once again
Im a son of animals, wild animals
Slash and chop her nipples,
clean it with some blood
And I chew it like a gum
I leave the car meanwhile the flames
Consume the screams of the packed corpses
Im the red light bandit.
Burning her pale meat
And countinious with other woman
Near in one bar she die in one motel
With these lyrics, you managed to scream a big fuck you in the face of modern rock music. I thought you didn’t HAVE A DICK YOU CUNT? And how dare you make a song about rape! What is the fucking point of this song? Hell, I could barely follow along and I speak your language! Your lyrics are disgusting, repulsive, lack any literary merit, and most of all show that you fail at simple grammar structure.
Go chop off your nipples.
Rating:
(This song is so bad I’m not even taking the time to link to Photobucket to give you a picture. This song gets a zero. That’s right. ZERO.)
~ 世愁歌
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